Guitar
by ShezzaMezza
Summary: Finn has learnt the guitar.  Rachel and Quinn find it hot.  What will happen next?  Crazy crack-fic!  Slash & FemSlash mentioned/implied.


**AN - So before I start, I'm going to tell you the backstory of how this story came to be. Me and my friend (**_**Jekrox**_**, who happens to be beta-ing this story) were talking over Facebook about how Finn played the guitar in Rumours. I was saying that, even though it was in the spoilers, I expected it to be mentioned and so this was the conversation that should of happened in after the song where he played guitar.**

**I know that most characters are a bit OOC, and say stuff that they'd never really say. Just be warned - it started as a joke and is really weird and random. And basically a major crack-fic.**

**And yes, I will get back to my other story, I just have a few one-shots (although I think I'll develop this further) that I've been meaning to write forever.**

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><p><em>Finn, Artie, Puck &amp; Sam:<br>*Sing "Never Going Back Again"*_

_Rachel:  
>"Oh Finn, when did you learn to play guitar? That's so romantic."<br>*bats eyes*_

_Quinn:  
>"Back off bitch, he's mine."<br>*weird Quinn mood change*  
>"That's super hot, I need to work it into out Prom campaign somehow. Because I don't really love you, I only want you for your popularity so I can get Prom Queen. Then I'm gonna dump you for SamPuck/Rachel/Artie/Someone else who's not you."_

_Finn:  
>"Well actually, good luck with that, because you are just being a manipulative bitch and using me. So imma do the breaking up this time, kay? I'm totally breaking up with you because I'm still in love with Rachel. If I can forgive you for sleeping with Puck <strong>and getting pregnant<strong> and then **LYING** to me about it, I can totally forgive Rach for making out with Puck, especially because she, at least, was honest to me about it. And I'm pretty sure that our relationship was on hiatus anyway, so it didn't really count."_

_Puc__k:_  
>"Oh sorry Finn for causing you all these problems! I just can't stand to see you in a relationship with anyone because I am actually totally in love with you. Yes, I'll admit it - I'm gay!"<br>*runs and hides*

_Finn:  
>"Why do the gay guys always fall in love with me? Does that make me gay? Maybe it's like the universe trying to tell me something. Sorry Quinn. No wait, I broke up with you. Sorry Rach."<br>*runs after Puck*_

_Rachel:  
>*grabs Finn so he doesn't leave yet*<br>"That's okay Finn! Q and I are actually in a secret relationship. Well, a secret foursome with Britt and San. Well, it was secret up until a few seconds ago. And we all knew that you were secretly gay because of gaydar or some shit, so we both pretended to be fighting over you as a guise. Also, I'm pretty sure everyone here is aware that you are in love with Noah. We're not blind."  
>*lets Finn go*<em>

_Quinn:  
>*bitch-slaps Rachel*<br>"Now I can't get Prom-Queen. Everyone knows I'm gay!"  
>*Quinn mood change*<br>"At least I can now do this without worrying about everyone finding out!"  
>*kisses Rachel*<em>

_Lauren:  
>"Satan, aren't you dating Karofsky? Won't he kill you when he find out that you're gay. He's very homophobic!"<em>

_Santana:  
>"No he won't kill me. But I will kill Man-Hands for outing me!"<br>*goes over to Rachel*_

_Brittany:  
>*kisses Santana before she can do anything drastic to Rachel*<em>

_Santana:  
>*breaks kiss*<br>"I guess it isn't so bad if I can do this."  
>*kisses Brittany again*<em>

_Kurt:  
>"I know why Karofsky doesn't care. He's totally gay too. I can confirm this. He kissed me once, that's why I transferred. But now it's okay because I'm in a threesome with him and Blaine."<em>

_Karofsky and Blaine:  
>*randomly appear making out with each other*<em>

_Kurt:  
>*joins Blainofsky*<em>

_Sam:  
>"I guess now would be as good a time as ever to admit to my gayness? So yeah, I'm gay. I'm also in love with Mike. He's hot."<em>

_Mike:  
>*kisses Sam*<br>"Sorry Tina, I've been in love with him since I met him."  
>*goes back to making out with Sam*<em>

_Tina:  
>"It's okay, I've been cheating on you and holding threesomes with Mercy and Lauren. Guys don't do it for me."<em>

_Artie:  
>"I'm pretty sure I'm the only one who hasn't admitted to my gayness. I'm gay and having an affair with Mr. Schue.<em>

_Mr. Schuester:  
>*walks in*<br>"Does anyone know why Puck and Finn are making out in the teachers' lounge?"  
>*seeing all these random gay couples, threesomes and foursomes making out*<br>"I don't want to know."  
>*walks out*<em>

_Artie:  
>*follows Mr. Schuester*<br>"Wait! Mr Schue! Everyone knows about us. Can we make out now?"_

_Mr. Schuester:  
>*kisses Artie*<em>

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><p><strong>AN - I didn't expect it to end up like this - with everyone gay. That's all for now, but if you guys like it, review and I'll write more! I'll probably make all the female teachers gay as well... Go Shue (Sue and (Shannon) Bieste) and Homma!<strong>

**Also again, thanks to my amazing beta _jekrox_, who has a new story out called "Little Known Things". I encourage you to read it, it's a Hevans.**


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